Feeling…

by Heidi on January 22, 2009

Demoralized.

Lost.

Lonely.

Frustrated.

Unmotivated.

Uninspired.

Getting on the plane to come back was quite possibly the most difficult thing I’ve done in a while. Coming back to work this morning was even harder. Staying after a 9am stern talking to about the professionalism of taking a day off blah blah blah made staying even more difficult and by 1pm I was in tears at my desk at yet another – albeit more stern – talking to. How can they expect loyalty and hard work when they don’t even treat us with respect?

Frustrated. Fed-up.

Yet somehow, stuck.

It’s a shitty economy. I’m lucky to even have a job. I know this. But does anyone really deserve a job that leaves you feeling unworthy and lifeless at the end of the day?

Wahhh wahhhh wahhh I know, I know but it’s my blog and I can cry if I want to. It’s my situation, and don’t think I haven’t been trying to get out of it. I have. For almost a year now.

*sigh* Onward to the bar to have drinks with three very lovely ladies. At least I’ve got friends who are fabulous and remind me that no matter what, a cute dog, a loving fiancé and good friends to laugh with really can cure anything at least for a short period of time.

I’m sorry I’ve been lacking on the bloggy front – CT was amazing, I have a few pictures soon, and being back…even though we’ve really been back for a little over 24 hours is just…already sucking the life out of me. I need to drag myself out of this funk and suck it up I know, but a big part of me wants to just curl up and cry for a long period of time and make all this go away on its own.

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Tagged as: DC, working hard or hardly working

  • http://valleygirl71.blogspot.com Valley Girl

    I know just how you feel.

  • http://jenniferblack6305.blogspot.com Jennifer

    I also had a rough work day. Hopefully it gets better!

  • http://www.confessionsofajerseygirl.com Rachel

    i know it’s hard when you don’t love your job. i’m there right now too… my boss is a complete asshole and it takes every ounce of my being not to sock him in the face three of four times a day. if i could leave? i would. i’ve tried. until the economy picks up, it looks like we’re both just… stuck. keep your chin up girl, it will get better. life has amazing things in store for you. xox

  • http://july-bug.blogspot.com julybug

    Sorry about the bad day!

  • http://talenttoplay.blogspot.com Playful Professional

    I think it’s a week for crappy jobs. I basically played the game, “Make excuses for someone else screwing up,” all night. And it sucked. Hope it gets better.

  • http://www.thebigpieceofcake.com/ Kate Coveny Hood

    As someone who is older and has had many jobs and many difficult bosses, I have to tell you… You should NEVER feel bad for taking a vacation day. That They are part of your benefits package, and you should be able to take them whenever you want. As a professional – you can decide whether your presence is absolutely necessary for ONE DAY (at the very least).

    Never let anyone try to make you feel like you aren’t being professional because you actually used your benefits package. That’s the kind of bullshit that create bitter, overworked people who – oh, I don’t know… make their employees feel guilty for having a life outside of the office. This makes me so angry. I’m beyond feeling “bad for you you.” I’m outraged on your behalf.

  • http://trigirl82.blogspot.com/ trigirl82

    :-( I’m sorry. I wish I had something along the lines of inspiration or motivation to give, but the job front for me sucks too. So why am I even commenting? Haha. This economy blows! :-) I hope it gets better for you. You deserve to take a time off. I don’t care if it’s the worst or best job in the world, in the end it is just a job. Your life outside of it is so much more important anyway. Besides as the previous comments stated, don’t let someone make you feel bad for taking a well deserved break! I hope they get their act together and realize that appreciated employees make for happier and productive ones, and if not, I hope you can find something else soon.. if you’re looking. :-)

  • http://www.secretlysupergirl.wordpress.com A Super Girl

    That sucks! Why give someone a hard time about taking a day off AFTER the day has been taken? Hope you have a better day tomorrow, at least it’s Friday!

  • http://missmusing.blogspot.com Jacqueline @ Miss Musing

    I’m sorry you’re going through this. Having to work in a place where your talents aren’t acknowledged and your hard work isn’t appreciated doesn’t seem fair or fun. Hopefully, you’ll be able to relax this weekend and do something fun to take your mind off of the crappy week.

    I have a friend who is also stuck in a less than desirable work situation, and her solution has been to schedule something fun, relaxing, exciting, etc. for right after work a few times a week so that she has something to look forward to. I’m not sure how feasible that is in your life, but it’s made a big difference for her.

    Hang in there <3

  • http://www.eachofthetwo.blogspot.com Each

    My job = your job.

    Pass the Pinot.

  • http://zandria.us Zandria

    It’s really unfortunate that a job can make us feel so low, especially when so many other things in our lives are going right. :(

  • http://www.larissamarks.com Larissa

    Job satisfaction is crucial. We spend so much time and energy at work, and if they’re hard or life-draining, it can totally affect us. Sorry you’re feeling so demoralized. Keep your chin up!

  • http://washwords.com/words Washwords

    Miss Heidi,

    Hang in there. Keep feeling. There’s an up side to it, too.

    and hey, you’re in the blogher posts d’jour today. that’s something.

    pink kisses to ya.

  • http://stylishhandwriting.com E.P.

    Oh, Heidi. I’m so sorry.

    For what it’s worth, I felt the same thing this week about my job. Many times. It sucks feeling like you’re stuck because of the economy. And it sucks even more knowing you want to be somewhere else where you’re actually an appreciated employee.

    … If you want to talk about it, I’m here. *hugs*

  • http://www.kylabea.com Kyla Bea

    Oh I’m so sorry.

    I hope that you can find some corners of comfort while you’re fighting through this. Feel better!

  • http://absolutlyfit.blogspot.com Laura

    My boyfriend and I are in the same situation. We don’t like our jobs and want to do something different, but can’t really afford to do so in this economy for fear we won’t find anything.

    It just all around sucks.

  • http://themoderngal.blogspot.com The Modern Gal

    I’m sorry work has been so crappy. I’ve definitely been there. I hope you find some way to make it bearable!

  • http://bucalu.blogspot.com Princess Extraordinaire

    Big hugs to you sweetie! I am so sorry things are so sucky right now – hang in there and know that this will pass…

  • http://autobiographyofmyfeet.wordpress.com Z

    (((hug))) hope things get better, stat!

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