Now, only a few people know how I met boyfriend. We keep the story short because well…it’s kind of shady. Not shady in a bad way but shady in the way that you’d think that we were both bad people shady. But this morning I read Jackie’s story over at Always a Northerner (great blog title btw!) and though I’m a day late…I am most certainly not a dollar short.
Anyhow, it’s kind of a long story so kick back and relax and read away!
I moved to DC on June 3, 2006. On May 16th, I walked out on my ex, the next day I took a train to Vermont and fought with the ex until he gave up and stopped calling. Three days later, my father hosted my graduation party where me, D, Tpup, and D’s friend J got redonkulously…drunk. The next morning, Tpup and I were getting ready to drive from Bennington to Burlington and dad sat down to have a chat. About me, getting my life together. Not partying blah blah blah. I had been graduated for two weeks after finishing a five year program where I had had little more than a week off at a time over the past four years between internships and co-op and classes so I felt I was entitled to you know…down a bottle of malibu at MY graduation party.
I was livid. Two days later as I sat with my grandparents and my aunt and my uncle who we had just welcomed home from Iraq, I vowed to move to DC by June 1. I was not going to live in my fathers house…after all…there was nothing for me in Vermont. My dreams were in DC.
Two and half weeks later after a whirlwind trip with my pal L, I had an apartment..no job but a place to live and roughly $2,000 to my name. I was determined to make this work.
A few weeks after moving in, a friend of mine from the college dems S, invited me to a party where I met A. A and i became pals…unlikely pals but pals no less. Drinking pals, we’d meet for happy hours, she was my one gal pal in the city – albeit a slightly annoying and controlling one but a pal no less which at that time in my life…was what i needed (since i lived with two dudes).
After spending the month of july partying hearty with my roommates and A…her and I went to dinner the night of August 1st. Celebrating my first salaried job at a small lawfirm in Georgetown. A job I came to loathe, that gave me a twitch and later fired me…but I’ll get to that.
“Let me call [boyfriend].. and tell him we’re not going to pub quiz…to have him meet us here.” She said. We had planned to go to pub quiz at Pour House on the hill but because we were late, we couldn’t get a table so we decided to go to dinner. She was bringing along her ex, who she wanted me to meet.
We ended up at a small Mexican place on 8th street, chatting over margaritas where I realized that her ex and I had a lot in common, he was a nice guy but being a girls girl, I didn’t think anything of it. She had given me some background to their 5 year long relationship that had ended the December before – ironically around the same time that my ex and I had a bad falling out (remedied three weeks later…). I didn’t think anything of it, after all every girl knows you don’t date a friends ex.
Her ex and I became facebook friends, A was trying to set me up with one of his friends who i thought was cute but it didn’t work out so whatever. Her ex and I kept chatting.
9/10/06…a sunday. The night before I had got piss drunk at Finn’s on 8th street and called G…the guy I was sort of kind of not really seeing but liked a lot. I was in the mind set back then that I was looking for Mr. Right. I was looking unfortunately, in all the wrong places. I left a G a wretched message about not playing games and was tired of him leading me on. The next day, A and I went to the Adam’s Morgan Festival and G returned my call (finally) and things ended on the front steps of a random persons apartment via telephone. Amidst my phone call, A invited me to a concert that she was going to with her ex, his friend that she was trying to set me up with and a couple of other people. At the time when she was inviting me, her ex texted me saying he had an extra ticket and did I want it. Sure! Why not!
I rushed home to change, we met up and I left stuff at A’s place so that I could spend the night in the city to get to Georgetown early for work. We met up for dinner, A talked to her pal that she also brought along and her ex and I were chatting and flirting over beers and hot dogs at Creme on U Street.
The concert – Snow Patrol and Augustana – was pretty awesome. I had never heard either band. But after the show, she told her ex that she was seeing someone else and was he okay with that. He later told me, that he was more than fine about it…that he realized that night that he really liked moi. Me? Still oblivious.
The next day, her ex and I went to dinner. It was strictly a friends thing and impromptu…he worked on the hill and I wanted to go to the 9/11 vigil at the capitol but couldn’t get in unfortunately. After he texted me and asked if i had gotten in, I said no but hey, feel like getting food since i’m on the hill and hungry? And he texted me saying ‘sure? what do you feel like?”
we met up at a chinese place on the hill and talked for a good two hours. I explained to him that i was tired of mind games … tired of meeting people at bars. He shared my sentiments. We left with a hug, later he told A and she asked him “you’re not trying to date my friend are you?”
His response? “i don’t think I’m her type.”
Truth be told? I never considered him. That Tuesday night, we hung out at Finns till about 1am. “You two are an awfully cute couple…i just hate politicians and lawyers.” a drunk marine told us. “we’re not…” i stammered. We both laughed and got on with our conversation. We lost track of time and next thing I knew it was 1am and I needed a cab back to Virginia.
The next weekend, A went out of town “you should hang out with my ex and he can introduce you to more people!”
And so I did. We shut down the bar Friday night. He put me in a cab and then promised to bring me Dunkin Donuts. The next morning? He showed up with dunkins. We spent the afternoon watching dvd’s then shopping. For shits, I wanted to buy a dress…”buy yourself a pretty dress and meet me at Finns at 10pm” so I did.
“Have you talked to my ex?” A asked. She had been trying to call him all day and he? Didn’t want to talk to her. He didn’t really want anything to do with her anymore since she was a constant source of drama in his life. I didn’t have to pick sides to see this…it was pretty blatant.
We met up at finns, we drank, we danced. We took a cab to the waterfront where he kissed me. It was sweet and unexpected and ohhh the butterflies. The butterflies that I still feel when i rub my legs with his in the morning to remind myself that he’s there. The butterflies I get when i see him at the metro waiting for me after work.
The kisses didn’t stop. They kept going, over drinks on the waterfront. Over a hookah in Georgetown and since homeboy didn’t have money for a cab home, I offered to let him stay at my places since my roommates were gone that weekend. So he did.
We hung out at his apartment on the Hill that Sunday afternoon, not answering our phones for anyone, and ending the night with a dance under the rotunda of the Capitol and kisses on the steps overlooking the Mall. It was the most perfect non-date, date weekend…ever.
We scheduled our first official date for that wednesday…september 28, 2006.
Monday morning I was on a high. I was getting work done at the job i hated, and by 10am…was fired from. “You’re not a good fit…” Good. I didn’t give a rats ass about that job anyhow. But the sting of rejection? The first job I had ever gotten fired from…hurt. A lot.
I called my mom. I called A – who met me for coffee downtown on my walk home from Georgetown. Finally I called…the boy. yes we’ll refer to him as the boy now…not A’s ex anymore…the boy. He offered to take me to lunch. A had told me not to go to the hill to see my old office since it wouldn’t help. I mentioned something about going home and relaxing. So i went home, changed and went to lunch with the boy at the Capitol Hill Club.
The next day, A and I had dinner plans for the premiere of Gilmore Girls. At the end of it…she offered to send me an email with a friend of the boy’s email address who worked at the DCCC. I told her to get on my computer, making sure to log out of everything because i get incredibly paranoid when others use my computer.
As I was putting dinner away, i thought “thats taking her an awfully long time…” but being a trusting person, i didn’t think she’d log into my computer (the passwords were all saved despite me logging out) and snoop through my email. But low and behold a few minutes later she practically ran out of my house, saying she had to go, and i’m sorry i should help clean up…but i really have to go.
You see, the night before her and her dude that she had been seeing ended things because they had just gotten too difficult. I think he was in med school and in the army. Then she snooped through my email to find out about the boy and i.
I called the boy to warn him…but she had already got him on the phone. This was not going to be pretty…and we had known that going into it. She called me later crying and asked me if i liked him…i said yes…i was sorry…it just happened. “I get that it just fucking happened…but what would you do if i gave you an ultimatum? Me or him.” “A…I don’t do ultimatums so clearly if you gave me one I don’t think you’d like my answer.”
She didn’t. But it was pretty clear by the end of the week that our friendship was all but over.
There were other things that happened, her and I going to a happy hour he had planned – she had told me at lunch a couple days later that she didn’t want to see us being all PDA’y…and didn’t want me to talk about him…etc. She constantly got between us at that happy hour with his friends needing to intervene. The final blow came “Ex, I’m getting ready to leave walk me upstairs? I need to talk to you.”
Guh.
The next night, she figured out that we had half been lying to her. She made me promise no more lies (they were for her own good…), and blah blah blah. Fine. No problem!
Within a few weeks, we had stopped talking, no more happy hours. Boyfriend and I had become inseparable. All bets were off. I had fallen head over heels in love with the boy I intend to marry someday.
The night of our first date, after going to see “last kiss” he taunted me all night by saying he wanted to tell me something but couldn’t…I got some sangria in him over tapas and after dinner, i asked him again. He pulled me into him “i’m falling in love with you” he whispered in my ear.
Cloud. Nine. No boy had ever been as romantic as this one. No boy had swept me off my feet the way this one had. I knew I had met my perfect match.
And that my friends…is how boyfriend and I met…two years ago in August 
Now i know i know i know, i broke the cardinal rule of friendship but…truth be told? I have amazing friends and though A was a great girl…she wasn’t JF, or Norbs, or TLB or S…those are my girls for life that have picked me up when I was down. When I called my gal pals to ease my worried mind when all this shit was going down “Dude, HB, how can i tell you not to when thats how I met k? I stole him from my friend on my birthday!” – norbs when i talked to her about this all. Well then.
And boyfriend and i? Lived happily ever after.
