Facebook, I am convinced, is a double edged sword. For the inner stalkers of all of us, we stalk old flames, old classmates, old friends that we lost touch with and potential new friends.
This morning, after checking my failing NCAA bracket, I checked out the feed on the front page. Wait who’s a mom?! I immediate clicked over to the profile of a girl I once went to high school with, whom I’d slack off during track practice with, who I thought was quite possibly one of the nicest girls ever. She’s married. And a mom. Congrats!
But seeing all these ladies I once acquainted myself with makes me miss my small town roots. It makes me regret not really have any connections to my high school class. I transferred to my high school sophomore year, made a few frenemies quickly and tried to recover until the day I graduated. I wouldn’t really call any of them “friends” in the traditional sense. I wish they had been. I was too…aloof. Too shy. I’ve never been good at that first step as far as meeting people. All of my current friends were easy to meet – L was my secret santa in SGA a couple years ago and we bonded by hanging out with N after I got back from DC, PBM i was in pep band with freshman and sophomore year – he introduced me to T, S, and M. The ex I met and became friends with through my best gay friend – J who was my infamous LJ stalker freshman year of college. Norbs and JF and I became friends because we all stood together at hockey games and I knew JF’s now fiancee R. It all happened so easier – of course asking pals to go out for a brewski after a hockey game is a helluva lot easier than asking someone that you’ve never met to dinner or happy hour.
When did making friends become so hard?
I digress…back to the matter at hand. I guess, seeing all my high school classmates get married and engaged and have babies over facebook makes me feel a little lost…a little left out which is traditional. A couple weeks ago I was actually contacted through classmates.com which i signed up oh so randomly a few years back, by a girl who for much of my tenure at CHS made my life hell. I know that things change, I know that people grow up and we’re not the same snarky, pretentious 17 and 18 year olds we once were.
I remember on a trip home senior year I ran into a couple guys who were in my class traveling home for the holidays via Greyhound up to Burlington from Boston. God that trip always sucked but Greyhound was really the easiest and most affordable way to get home. I tried to catch up, say hello – did I mention I loathe small talk? Well I do – anyhow, they were cold. Icy. It reminded me of the snarkiness that I had tried to put behind me. I had no need for attitudes. So I brushed it off and stopped trying to be friendly with people, after all, who says people really do change? Clearly some of the same ass holes just grew up to be bigger ass holes.
I do have to mention though, the few times I’ve caught up with people, generally there have been good conversations. One of my classmates follow(ed)(s?) my blog and I feel honored…but it makes me wish thing…well…that I had been different back in my younger days. Maybe less annoying? Maybe less shy? Maybe less of an over achiever? I don’t know.
But I do know facebook makes me feel old. I wish all of my classmates…whoever reads this…that may be engaged/married/parents…all the best in the future and maybe when we have that 5/10 year reunion, may things be worlds different from back in 2001.
What was your high school experience like?
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
High school was just so-so for me. I wasn’t popular but I wasn’t forgettable either. I was the shy girl, turned class clown, turned shy girl again. I had fun but I didn’t have a really big group of friends. I had a small, tight knit group. We stayed in contact for a couple of years post graduation, but I don’t talk to anyone anymore. I see plenty of them on Facebook and Myspace…even at my gym. I don’t know if they don’t recognize me or choose to ignore me. And I’m okay with that. I went to an all-girls school. Most of them are those typical snotty girls who get wasted, sleep around and talk about their friends behind their backs.
I’d rather reminisce about grade school haha!
Man, high school. I totally feel the same way about the facebook. Sometimes I see something and I’m like WHAT! ::jawdrop::
I really loved high school though, and remain close with a few people from it. It’s just crazy to think how much has changed and how far I’ve come between then and now, and it wasn’t even THAT long ago.
ps- cute picture
I feel the same way. I’m secretly dreading my high school reunion. Everyone I know has gotten married and had babies, I feel so left behind. I actually loved high school. I wasn’t really in a clique but I floated between them. It was fun. The real kicker came a year after I graduated I bumped into a friend of mine whose sister I was really close with. The sister, C, was really virginal, never really had a boyfriend, was always the one to state that she was saving herself for marriage. When I spoke to her sister she told me she was pregnant and had to drop out of the military. It’s sad really, but I just smiled and said wow a lot. Now, I’ve lost contact with most of my friends from high school, even though I still live in the same city. Sad, but true.
double edged sword is such a good definition of facebook.
in high school i was sort of like i am now. wasn’t popular, but wasn’t unpopular. i hung out with everyone. long term boyfriend (i’m a serial monogomist). goody two shoes. and a good student.
scary, but not much has changed.
well my eyebrows are plucked now. i think i need to post about this soon for proof.
Ahhhh high school. It was an okay time, but would I go back if someone paid me? Ohhhhh no way! I hated that everyone wanted to compartmentalize everyone into certain buckets. I sort of crossed a few lines and that always seemed to not be kosher for the system.
The funny thing though about the reunion was that, for the most part, those barracades seemed to be lifted. People were friendly regardless of how they may have typically been in high school. Of course, there were the select few who remained their usual sour-puss selves, but for the most part, all pleasant surprises.
And because I looooove this topic so much …
Post #1 (Pre-Reunion)
Post #2 (Post-Reunion)
Not bad times – but yeah, not sad to be on a much later chapter!
I went to a very small school for 12 years with the same people. By the time we were in high school I was sick of almost everyone. I spent my senior year abroad in France and it was the best decision ever.
I went to an all girls Catholic high school, that had about 500 girls total.
While there were a few days that sucked, I really loved it all.
I tried to be friends with almost all of the girls… not because I needed to be popular, but because once someone knew something about you then the whole damn school knew.
I stay in touch with maybe 5-6 girls from HS. Most of them I was friends since middle school and one of them is pregnant and married.
That definitely is what is weird about Facebook! My high school friends and I seem to grow more and more apart every year. Most of them stayed in Minnesota, got married, work “just okay” jobs, while I have moved around, pursued an elite graduate degree, etc… It’s hard for me to accept that I have made very different choices and that, frankly, I don’t have the time and energy it would take to maintain all of those old relationships.